Today’s teens have become overwhelmed and anxiety-ridden with school work, extracurricular activities, to-do’s and social pressures. And to take it a step further, they don’t know how to relax, ‘shake it off’, or decompress. They continue to carry around the overwhelm, worry and pressure until it evolves into something bigger. Often, in my coaching practice, teens talk with me about that wave of concern that wash over them when they try to relax or are WITHOUT the stresses and laundry list of homework, practice and school responsibilities.
“Am I missing something?…what should I be doing?” Either they can’t shut their brains of or their brains are searching for forgotten ‘ghost’ tasks or to-do’s that don’t exist. They have become so accustomed to running from point A to point B with little to no downtime, that relaxing and decompressing feel uncomfortable. It breaks my heart.
My teen client’s concerns sound like the worries of an overworked adult on the verge of burnout. As an adult, you may be able to relate, experiencing your first few days of vacation or holiday feeling anxious and on high-alert that something work-related may fall through the cracks while you’re away.
When our teens attempt to take a break or have the opportunity to “relax” what do they gravitate toward as a means to decompress? You guessed it – their devices. Phones, laptops, video games, social media, youtube, you name it!
Research shows, our devices are not the best means of decompression, for various reasons: First, excessive screen time is linked to increased anxiety and depression. Screen time is known to disrupt sleep, especially if viewed before bedtime. Gaming and social media both have addictive properties (my teen clients have shared the ‘love-hate’ relationship with their devices) and take away from time spent outdoors and/or moving their bodies. Social media use typically promotes socially isolating behaviors. And an over-reliance on screens is shown to affect attention span, critical thinking and problem solving skills. Yikes! Here’s what you can do…
Below is a list of healthy ways for your teen to decompress without using devices or gaming!
- Go outdoors – walk, inhale fresh air, sit under a tree, hike, run, bike, birdwatch
- Face to face social interactions – meeting up with a friend or family member
- Move your body – go outside to walk, run, bike or play a sport. Go to a gym, take a workout class
- Volunteer – give back! Not only will it feel good inside, but most teens need to fulfill community service hours for graduation. Win-win!
- Get creative – cook, craft, create, write, build something
- Listen to music
- Meditate or do Yoga
- Re-engage with a hobby you enjoy or pick up a new one
- Read for pleasure
At the end of the day, relaxation and decompression (especially in the world we live in) needs to become a practice. Consistently incorporating any of the above activities into your family routine or teenager’s life will greatly counteract the stresses and pressures teens face around academics, school responsibilities, family commitments and extracurriculars. Sometimes, however, simply incorporating dedicated relaxation time isn’t enough. If you’re looking for professional insight, I’d love to connect with you. Feel free to schedule a complimentary consultation with me.
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